The Richardson who usually hosts the media goes out of his way to convince you of the rightness of his decision. He is confident, bigger than life and even becomes jocular at times; he is a master of the room.

The Richardson who sat before a phalanx of news media Wednesday was anything but. At moments he appeared still to be working out the issue in his head and doubt occasionally crept in to darken his face.

Are there people who deserve the death penalty? Is it right for the state to execute a killer? What about the flaws in the system? And what of the United States’ general approval of the death penalty when compared to most Western democracies?

Richardson struggled to balance all those competing interests, but appeared unable to arrive at an absolutely satisfactory answer.

“I believe it’s the right decision. My conscience feels good, but I am still troubled,” Richardson said, by way of explaining his decision to repeal the death penalty.

He paused.

“I still wonder if… I know we did the right thing, but I am not totally, totally convinced that every argument that I have just said to you is accurate,” he said.

It was a surprising moment for Richardson, who made the admission before a bevy of repeal supporters. Just moments earlier, Bishop Ricardo Ramirez of the Diocese of Las Cruces had praised Richardson for his action.

“We cannot teach that killing is wrong by killing those who kill,” Ramirez said.

Richardson had begun his news conference Wednesday by alluding to a six-year evolution he had experienced regarding the death penalty.

Richardson for years had supported the death penalty, and apparently still does for certain cases, including for Michael Paul Astorga. Astorga is charged with killing Bernalillo County Sheriff’s Deputy James McGrane Jr.

But Richardson had come to the conclusion that the system was flawed.

“The sad truth is the wrong person can still be convicted in this day and age, and in cases where that conviction carries with the ultimate sanction, we must have ultimate confidence – I would say certitude – that the system is without flaw or prejudice,” he said.

About 130 people in 26 states have been exonerated since the early 1970s, according to the Death Penalty Information Center. That number includes four people from New Mexico.

The governor added, “And it bothers me greatly that minorities are over-represented in the prison population and on death row.”

Richardson also said the U.S. was out of step with most Western democracies, including those in the European Union, which has banned capital punishment.

And he admitted his legacy factored into his calculus. He acknowledged that he hoped his administration would be remembered for “doing the right thing, making decisions on matters of conscience.”

Once he had decided there were too many reasons to discontinue the death penalty, he wanted to satisfy himself that life without parole was a suitable punishment for those who commit heinous crimes.

To discern an answer, Richardson said he had toured New Mexico’s death row Wednesday, even exchanging a nod with one of New Mexico’s two death row inmates.

“I went to the prison today to look at the conditions, the death chamber,” he said. “I wanted to see what imprisonment for life would look like. Those cells are worse than death.”

Prisoners sentenced to life without parole beginning on July 1, when the law takes effect, will spend 23 hours out of every day in them.

Richardson said correctional officers told him they thought the death penalty was a deterrent against inmate violence within the prisons.

He said he accepted their opinions. Those opinions and the visit to death row had been part of his effort to discern what to do, he said. In addition, he met with the public Monday, while his office took nearly 12,000 calls and e-mails on the issue, with more than two-thirds of individuals favoring the repeal.

One of the women with whom he had met Monday — the day he opened his office to the public — was the mother of Dena Lynn Gore, the little girl Terry Clark raped and murdered. Terry Clark is the only man New Mexico has executed since 1960.

“It was a very poignant moment,” Richardson said. “To the families of victims … I say to them, I hope I made the right decision. But I can assure you that the punishment that is now policy — life imprisonment without parole — is a very severe punishment. That is why I wanted to go see it today myself in the prison.”

But then the doubt crept back in.

“My decision probably is not one associated with perfection,” he said.

Even though Richardson isn’t going to take a spot in the Obama administration, the death penalty repeal has an opportunity to pass, as the governor signaled in a recent Associated Press story that he may be changing his mind on the death penalty.

He’s said his position on the subject has “softened” and that there’s a good chance he’d opt to replace the death penalty with a life sentence without parole, as called for in the bill.

“Right now, I’d say it’s probably a 50-50 proposition,” the second-term governor told the Associated Press.

“I’m struggling with my position, but I definitely have softened my view on the death penalty,” he said.

A bill advocating the repeal of the death penalty has passed the House and is making its way through the Senate.

So what is changing his mind? Richardson told the AP that his position on the controversial issue has been softened by arguments of prosecutorial abuse and miscarriages of justice. The cost of the death penalty, which has been used as an argument by supporters of a repeal, is low on the reasons of why he would consider the repeal. But he describes it as a “valid” argument nonetheless.

The state of New Mexico very rarely uses the death penalty. The last occasion was in 2001 in the case of convicted child rapist and murderer Terry Clark. That execution was the only one since the death penalty was reinstated in New Mexico in 1978.

Stateline.org discusses this in light of not only New Jersey’s repeal of capital punishment last year, but action in Maryland suggesting that state may do so as well. In Maryland, the news Web site says, the blow to capital punishment may come from the recommendation of a state commission looking at the controversial practice. In New Mexico it may come from a stronger progressive wing in the Legislature — and a new governor.

In New Mexico, it is not the work of a commission, but the outcome of November’s elections that could lead to a repeal, supporters say. In the state Senate, where a repeal bill failed narrowly after it passed the House of Representatives in 2007, Democrats gained three seats, and Majority Leader Michael Sanchez (D) told Stateline.org he is “very hopeful” the pick-ups will propel the legislation early next year.

Stateline.org went on to say that the bigger change could be in the form of Gov. Bill Richardson heading to Washington, D.C. and Lt. Gov. Diane Denish taking over if and when he is confirmed as commerce secretary. Right now it seems like a good bet that Richardson will be confirmed.

The news site quotes state Rep. Gail Chasey — a past lead sponsor of the death penalty repeal — as saying: “Our primary difficulties in the Senate (in 2007) were with the executive. The governor was running for president, and he simply preferred not to have that bill reach his desk.”

In other words, Chasey, an Albuquerque Democrat, believes Richardson didn’t want a controversial bill to reach his desk and potentially cost him votes nationwide.

But repeal is by no means a sure thing, as evidenced by an outgoing district attorney quoted by Stateline.org.

“Every session the dynamics are different. Because you’ve had some partial success on moving a bill through doesn’t necessarily mean the same thing is going to happen the next time when the dynamics have changed,” said Henry Valdez, a district attorney in Santa Fe, N.M., who supports the death penalty.

While opponents of capital punishment have made their voices heard in recent years, Valdez said, “the first time a 9-year-old girl is raped and killed, the advocates on the other side are going to come out.”

In a similar article in November from the Santa Fe New Mexican, Steve Terrell noted:

New Mexico is one of 36 states with a capital punishment law. The number slowly is going down. Last year, New Jersey became the latest to repeal its death-penalty law, replacing the sentence of execution with life without parole.

Two people are on death row in New Mexico. Timothy Allen of Bloomfield was convicted in 1995 of first-degree murder, rape and kidnapping. Robert Fry of Farmington was convicted in 2002 of two counts of first-degree murder; two counts of kidnapping; one count of rape; two counts of tampering with evidence; and a count of attempted robbery with a deadly weapon.

Terrell also spoke to Viki Elkey, coordinator of the New Mexico Coalition to Repeal the Death Penalty, who said that Chasey will once again carry the perennial legislation to abolish the death penalty, which Terrell writes is the type that “pops up in the state Legislature every 60-day session, getting much discussion, raising emotions and eventually dying in some committee.”

New Mexico has rarely even used the death penalty. The last time the death penalty was used in New Mexico was in 2001 when Terry Clark was executed. The execution of the child rapist and murderer was the only one since the death penalty was reinstated in New Mexico in 1978.